Whether it was because I was younger and was ignorant enough to truly believe this world and that world were separate, or whether I was the same asshole then as I am now, it never even once crossed my mind that "Cloud" should adhere to the same rules I did.  At the time, the Internet and the real world were two entirely separate places.  In my head, "Cloud" being with "Angel" was entirely acceptable.

I wasn't old enough to know what that next level of romance meant, but I was definitely old enough to be interested.  All of the things I never had the courage or capability to do in the real world, Cloud was more than capable of doing.  Dating, going out, cuddling, making out.  Done entirely through words on a screen, sure.  But still important enough for me to recognize.  I didn't ask for Angel's real name and she didn't ask for mine. It was taboo to acknowledge the real world, and even more so to actively ask about it.  Oh and if you're wondering whether or not my "summer of Cloud and Angel" seemed to fall in a time when I was still nearly a half year away from ending my relationship with Megan back in reality, then you'd very much be correct.  Not every thing I write in here will be flattering to reflect on.  In fact, much of it will paint me in a fair negative light.  But I need that.  I need to see it all.  I need true reflection on how I got here.

I could call it whatever I wanted to then, and I can call it whatever I want to now, but it is what it is.  I was actively cheating that summer.  Megan would never know about it, in fact almost no one ever knew about it.  Doesn't make it any less wrong.